The case for Busting Inside
Pretty much exactly what it sounds like
The reason you’re depressed and dont know what to do and uncertain and alienated and seeking meaning in politics by becoming a racist twitter account, or by penning a shitty ”BLM” sign and putting it in your window out to the streets, on the second floor in a suburb in fucking Denmark, is because you did not bust inside. You are not building a future with her Martin. You’re postponing building a future every day, pushing it off a little more every day, and that’s what’s making you unhappy.
You are biologically going through the process your dad went through at 50, male menopause, ”midlife crisis” which is an abyss of lack of meaning after you no longer having children living at home. A terrible modernity problem in itself but that’s not important right now. You’re not 50 right now. You’re 25 or something. 24. Whatever. however old you are.
The idea in your head is that there is a ”meaning” hole in you, that there is a valid category called meaning or purpose, which, ”having children” is a kind of arbitrarily solution for, some “thing” that just so happens to fill that void – could have been something else, your career or pokemons or warhammer figures or creative fulfilment or becoming a world renowned artists. You think of all of these as being arbitrary solutions for the core fundamental ”meaning” problem, and of ”having children” as being just one in a series of possible, arbitrary options. And that’s where you’re wrong.
A classic case of the modernity swindle, which is confusing the cause for the effect. Obscuring causality. In short, ”having kids” does not ”come after” ”meaning”. ”Having kids” is not an effect/solution to an underlying ”meaning” cause/problem. ”Meaning” is a metaphor for ”having kids” - it comes after.
The word ”meaning” refers to an abstraction which is caused by, having kids. “Meaning”, the word, is etymologically rooted in, the physical act of Being A Father. Historically, linguistically and existentially, psychologically, ”having kids” comes first.
The real ”meaning hole” is not ”inside you”. It is not a metaphorical abstraction for some kind of deep spiritual problem you have. It is a literal physical hole, that you can solve in a very practical way.
A thought I had walking down to my grocery store, you could write it out as a whole 10 page essay but the point is kind of simple and I still have to make dinner. just something short and sweet to show you I care
"hahaha, yeah"
i didn't "get" God until i saw my daughter. i do not think this is a bug, i know this is feature. it's a leap. i told my parents i was going to have a child, and all my mother could think of was the economic damage it was going to cause. it's cope. this random "oh we are waiting until this, or that, or whatever." it is a decision, and when you "leap" with your Fat Load into true Risk, then you see that God planned giving you a Dick and making you love Fucking, because it is Holy.