When I got into the relationship with my fiancée, I – this is no joke – had to remind myself daily of your Uncritical Theory post, so that I wouldn't fuck everything up. Now the first child is on it's way and we're getting married soon. Your ideas had such a big influence on my life, it's unreal. Thank you.
Congratulations on the baby! It's going to be a wild ride!
Unsolicited advice:
There are two of you don't try to keep going when you're frustrated and it's 3AM and you haven't slept, get the other person to help, and be open to being awakened to provide relief in kind.
This will reveal aspects of yourself (good and bad) that you never expected.
Just hopping in to remind you that you can do it! First of all this sensation will pass. It will come back, too, but so what? Just another noumena to observe and release. I think you should probably go back to school, where you'll meet many beautiful ladies, many meticulously programmed drones, and have a few luminous conversations. Faith is the death of probability, because all things are possible with God. Get your ass back in church, an Orthodox one, that has other americans in it. You still have infinite possibility but you have to seek change. Spinning your wheels in your apartment, at the gym, and washing dishes will continue indefinitely until you decide to pursue something. Doesn't really matter what, it just has to be hard and take a while. Nobody changes until the pain of changing is less than the pain of staying the same.
Hey man isn’t possible for you to get a job or traineeship where you’re surrounded by people who are pretty smart? I mean I am probably not as smart as you, but I’ve worked with people who are ridiculously smart, and they seemed happy enough having at least reasonably intelligent company. Seems like most of your trouble comes from having a dull job.
"can human beings organize themselves productively at the scale of millions and billions?"
In a humane way? Lol, he said, lmao.
This reminds me I need to figure out when the men's group meets at my Church and start going. It's pretty much all millennial dads such as myself and they are my natural community.
"My only chance of ever meeting a compatible woman is to become a famous blogger." You and I both know that isn't how life works
"The real trouble with the system is it tries to make you feel crazy for caring. The difference between an academic or a paranoid schizophrenic is whether you say “the system” or the polite academic term that's currently in vogue, capital, etc." Human earnestness and yearning is a feature and not a bug, yet often we fall into mockery and abuse of those who show it. It's okay to be earnest.
I happen to quite like earnestness and sentimentality. It makes me tear up when I listen to certain music (for one example), and I only wish others could feel like that, too, it's fantastic.
> Sometimes that’s it, and sometimes I have months long periods of paranoid delusions and think I’m about to die, because some part of my body aches. Coming out of a couple of months of that now.
This sort of thing happens to me when I get wrapped up in myself. Your body is looking for danger because it knows something is wrong with your life, and is subconsciously problem solving. In my case, the only outlet was forced discomfort, whether that be an arduous hike, swim in near freezing temps, etc. It means replacing the fake dnger wih a real danger.
My guess is hiking (or anything "getting outside") is just advanced breathwork + eye movement, while cold plunges stimulates the Vagus nerve which helps with calming down. "parasympathetic" or "rest and digest" gets brought up a lot.
The rhetoric evolves into replacing false danger with real laborious work. In other words, stuff that puts one in peace that is good enough as a sleeping aid (Wim Hof lol).
One time the priest said "If you look up to the skies for Christ you will miss him standing right next to you." If we came here for cool, Randy, we'd me missing the thing we all really like, which is the sense that we aren't the only ones in the building so to speak. Thanks for rolling in the mud with us. Your stuff genuinely makes life better for at least one guy here.
You write to us on Good Friday, it's ok to be down. No one knows what's coming next. Christ is standing next to you, and also she's out there bro
On a less serious note, you beat me to a bit I was thinking about for comedy, which is that instead of young kids saying they hate "men" or "women" they should focus all that energy into just hating the one boy/girl at school they actually hate. This is what made our society so strong.
"My only chance of ever meeting a compatible woman is to become a famous blogger."
Another case of "man thinks he needs $300k job to acquire mate". You don't need some 200iq gal to debate theology with or whatever, all you need is a gal who's simple, warm, and loyal. Those still exist, they're just supremely underrepresented and kind of hard to find. But they can be found if you're willing to look everywhere you can.
Now RE: regarded coworkers, I think this is unavoidable, except maybe at very small, very well-run businesses, which is almost none of them. So we have to learn how to deal with this fact of life somehow, without letting it get to us.
I think you know all this, I just want you to remember for a moment, because I don't want you to suffer so much.
There's a chance, but I genuinely think e-celebrity is a more realistic shot. Things are changing, I think dating apps are on their way out. All my young friends are finding theirs on twitter and Instagram
Chemistry is important as is good communication, you can't communicate fully via the computer ~ facial tics or whatever are critical to communication .
I'm in the got out and _DO_ something group here ~ I don't have the facbok, I rarely drink and never to get blitzed etc. but simply by being in jury duty of all places I met this fantastic woman I've been with longer than I was married .
Age has nothing to do with finding a mate .
-Nate
(OOPS ! I had to edit this ~ I meant I can't imagine meeting a Significant Other online because the fact to face aspect is when you see if there's any real chemistry)
Here goes my 2 cents, a bit of advice I learned later in life than I would have liked.. and still have to remind myself of.
In scripture it teaches us to learn to live above ones circumstances. Of course, stoics and others have said similar. It is true and very powerful if embraced. Build a fiery stronghold around your heart to hold your purpose , as well as the will of God. Insulate it with love and rise yourself above the clouds and storms of life. This material world and its existence based in matter is just a blink. Seek God's face everyday, choose to see the beauty in the world. Transmute the negative and learn gratitude. Once I allowed these sayings to cross the threshold from platitude to practice.. my life changed.
> My only chance of ever meeting a compatible woman is to become a famous blogger.
*Glares at Curtis Yarvin furiously*
But in all seriousness, there is this weird maxim, that the more someone wishes to retire, the more likely they will never be able to do so. In the same vein, I believe in the simple principle: (a) the one tries to date a 10 the more likely they will need to settle for less; (b) the more one tries to "settle" the more they will be forever alone; (c) but paradoxically the more one wants to be left alone in their success a more attractive he becomes to women of worth. The aspirational, the mediocre, the apex.
> I live in a prison cell... Nothing happens.
This idea comes up all the time, maybe instead of seeing this as Foucault's prison, treat it as reality, as all there is. I do not know if this is the sadly disappointing American Dream people keeps talking about, but this ain't it. Personally I would puke at first sight of the China Dream for its flamboyance. https://archive.md/ovdii
> I’m a reverse Cypher from the matrix. I would sell out in a second, if I could.
Simply put, there are two main lines of thought: (a) you are the "chosen one" refusing the call, (b) the matrix does not exist, and nobody within the system wants to "buy you in". The latter is what everyone else with a good pay grade and savings would day. The latter however can only be confirmed by one thing: the arrow always pointing towards what one ought to do when they face soul-crushing work. Maybe Substack or even a wiki or a self-help compendium is your future. https://archive.md/g3Vwghttps://archive.md/4fgjAhttps://archive.md/g3Vwg
> I have had at least a hundred, but maybe hundreds plural at this point, of strangers writing me to tell me that I have helped them with something important.
Keep writing, you have stated the common experience of a unique demographic, and I don't pull my weight only because writing is not my strong suit. Keep going.
Nothing about your problem sounds impossible. This post reminded me of one of my friends when she goes on about her guy problems. She's older and might be afraid she's missed the timeframe, and has certain drawbacks just like you claim you have but that's still missing the point. She doesn't want the pain required to change and deal with reality. She wants to continue her narrative.
It will require acute pain, like a one minute plank, and could take two years to implement fully. You already know what you need to do.
If you can understand Derrida, you can figure this out. This doesn't sound impossible.
Do a breakdown on Derrida, Sartre, Guattari, and Lacan please. I do not know what the different stance are between those four around the same era. Is this something to do with "bad faith"?
When I got into the relationship with my fiancée, I – this is no joke – had to remind myself daily of your Uncritical Theory post, so that I wouldn't fuck everything up. Now the first child is on it's way and we're getting married soon. Your ideas had such a big influence on my life, it's unreal. Thank you.
congratulations on your family, I wish you great joy
Congratulations on the baby! It's going to be a wild ride!
Unsolicited advice:
There are two of you don't try to keep going when you're frustrated and it's 3AM and you haven't slept, get the other person to help, and be open to being awakened to provide relief in kind.
This will reveal aspects of yourself (good and bad) that you never expected.
Thanks! I'll keep this in mind. I'm sure it will reveal a lot, and that is simultaneously exciting and terrifying.
Lord willing, faith can be the death of probability! I hope I discover this is true someday.
I'm pretty sure it's true already. Follow-through is just a bitch
Just hopping in to remind you that you can do it! First of all this sensation will pass. It will come back, too, but so what? Just another noumena to observe and release. I think you should probably go back to school, where you'll meet many beautiful ladies, many meticulously programmed drones, and have a few luminous conversations. Faith is the death of probability, because all things are possible with God. Get your ass back in church, an Orthodox one, that has other americans in it. You still have infinite possibility but you have to seek change. Spinning your wheels in your apartment, at the gym, and washing dishes will continue indefinitely until you decide to pursue something. Doesn't really matter what, it just has to be hard and take a while. Nobody changes until the pain of changing is less than the pain of staying the same.
You've got to keep hypergamy in mind, you've gotta be releasing power/progress vibes to fix no gf. Let her ride your coat tails.
I'm pretty sure he's a Europoor in Europooristan.
Hey man isn’t possible for you to get a job or traineeship where you’re surrounded by people who are pretty smart? I mean I am probably not as smart as you, but I’ve worked with people who are ridiculously smart, and they seemed happy enough having at least reasonably intelligent company. Seems like most of your trouble comes from having a dull job.
"can human beings organize themselves productively at the scale of millions and billions?"
In a humane way? Lol, he said, lmao.
This reminds me I need to figure out when the men's group meets at my Church and start going. It's pretty much all millennial dads such as myself and they are my natural community.
"My only chance of ever meeting a compatible woman is to become a famous blogger." You and I both know that isn't how life works
"The real trouble with the system is it tries to make you feel crazy for caring. The difference between an academic or a paranoid schizophrenic is whether you say “the system” or the polite academic term that's currently in vogue, capital, etc." Human earnestness and yearning is a feature and not a bug, yet often we fall into mockery and abuse of those who show it. It's okay to be earnest.
I happen to quite like earnestness and sentimentality. It makes me tear up when I listen to certain music (for one example), and I only wish others could feel like that, too, it's fantastic.
> Sometimes that’s it, and sometimes I have months long periods of paranoid delusions and think I’m about to die, because some part of my body aches. Coming out of a couple of months of that now.
This sort of thing happens to me when I get wrapped up in myself. Your body is looking for danger because it knows something is wrong with your life, and is subconsciously problem solving. In my case, the only outlet was forced discomfort, whether that be an arduous hike, swim in near freezing temps, etc. It means replacing the fake dnger wih a real danger.
It is not danger but peace-awareness that one needs to do, he is not likely to be the kind of guy that is complacent and obese. https://bioenergetics.org.uk/leaving/ https://bioenergetics.org.uk/endurer/
My guess is hiking (or anything "getting outside") is just advanced breathwork + eye movement, while cold plunges stimulates the Vagus nerve which helps with calming down. "parasympathetic" or "rest and digest" gets brought up a lot.
The rhetoric evolves into replacing false danger with real laborious work. In other words, stuff that puts one in peace that is good enough as a sleeping aid (Wim Hof lol).
This is a lovely post. I sincerely hope you do find someone compatible.
missed u
One time the priest said "If you look up to the skies for Christ you will miss him standing right next to you." If we came here for cool, Randy, we'd me missing the thing we all really like, which is the sense that we aren't the only ones in the building so to speak. Thanks for rolling in the mud with us. Your stuff genuinely makes life better for at least one guy here.
You write to us on Good Friday, it's ok to be down. No one knows what's coming next. Christ is standing next to you, and also she's out there bro
On a less serious note, you beat me to a bit I was thinking about for comedy, which is that instead of young kids saying they hate "men" or "women" they should focus all that energy into just hating the one boy/girl at school they actually hate. This is what made our society so strong.
Randy the Wandering Jew of the Internet
"My only chance of ever meeting a compatible woman is to become a famous blogger."
Another case of "man thinks he needs $300k job to acquire mate". You don't need some 200iq gal to debate theology with or whatever, all you need is a gal who's simple, warm, and loyal. Those still exist, they're just supremely underrepresented and kind of hard to find. But they can be found if you're willing to look everywhere you can.
Now RE: regarded coworkers, I think this is unavoidable, except maybe at very small, very well-run businesses, which is almost none of them. So we have to learn how to deal with this fact of life somehow, without letting it get to us.
I think you know all this, I just want you to remember for a moment, because I don't want you to suffer so much.
It's not about needed a 200 iq, it's about me being a deranged recluse who doesn't drink and don't have a Facebook account
But I appreciate it
But you have the dating app. "In sterquiliniis invenitur" maybe.
There's a chance, but I genuinely think e-celebrity is a more realistic shot. Things are changing, I think dating apps are on their way out. All my young friends are finding theirs on twitter and Instagram
didn’t you recently drop a girl just because she watched stupid tv? they all watch stupid tv randy, I pay attention randy you can’t trick me
Not recently and no, that was just describing a deep terror i felt. She dropped me
I can't imagine meeting my S.O. on line .
Chemistry is important as is good communication, you can't communicate fully via the computer ~ facial tics or whatever are critical to communication .
I'm in the got out and _DO_ something group here ~ I don't have the facbok, I rarely drink and never to get blitzed etc. but simply by being in jury duty of all places I met this fantastic woman I've been with longer than I was married .
Age has nothing to do with finding a mate .
-Nate
(OOPS ! I had to edit this ~ I meant I can't imagine meeting a Significant Other online because the fact to face aspect is when you see if there's any real chemistry)
Here goes my 2 cents, a bit of advice I learned later in life than I would have liked.. and still have to remind myself of.
In scripture it teaches us to learn to live above ones circumstances. Of course, stoics and others have said similar. It is true and very powerful if embraced. Build a fiery stronghold around your heart to hold your purpose , as well as the will of God. Insulate it with love and rise yourself above the clouds and storms of life. This material world and its existence based in matter is just a blink. Seek God's face everyday, choose to see the beauty in the world. Transmute the negative and learn gratitude. Once I allowed these sayings to cross the threshold from platitude to practice.. my life changed.
> My only chance of ever meeting a compatible woman is to become a famous blogger.
*Glares at Curtis Yarvin furiously*
But in all seriousness, there is this weird maxim, that the more someone wishes to retire, the more likely they will never be able to do so. In the same vein, I believe in the simple principle: (a) the one tries to date a 10 the more likely they will need to settle for less; (b) the more one tries to "settle" the more they will be forever alone; (c) but paradoxically the more one wants to be left alone in their success a more attractive he becomes to women of worth. The aspirational, the mediocre, the apex.
> I live in a prison cell... Nothing happens.
This idea comes up all the time, maybe instead of seeing this as Foucault's prison, treat it as reality, as all there is. I do not know if this is the sadly disappointing American Dream people keeps talking about, but this ain't it. Personally I would puke at first sight of the China Dream for its flamboyance. https://archive.md/ovdii
> I’m a reverse Cypher from the matrix. I would sell out in a second, if I could.
Simply put, there are two main lines of thought: (a) you are the "chosen one" refusing the call, (b) the matrix does not exist, and nobody within the system wants to "buy you in". The latter is what everyone else with a good pay grade and savings would day. The latter however can only be confirmed by one thing: the arrow always pointing towards what one ought to do when they face soul-crushing work. Maybe Substack or even a wiki or a self-help compendium is your future. https://archive.md/g3Vwg https://archive.md/4fgjA https://archive.md/g3Vwg
> I have had at least a hundred, but maybe hundreds plural at this point, of strangers writing me to tell me that I have helped them with something important.
Keep writing, you have stated the common experience of a unique demographic, and I don't pull my weight only because writing is not my strong suit. Keep going.
P.S. Might wanna research characterology and check em' out, it sounds like some RPG-tier stuff but it works? https://devaraj2.substack.com/p/reichian-characterology
Bruh
"it’s better to have a problem with a woman, than to have a problem with every woman" – absolute whipcrack of a sentence!
Nothing about your problem sounds impossible. This post reminded me of one of my friends when she goes on about her guy problems. She's older and might be afraid she's missed the timeframe, and has certain drawbacks just like you claim you have but that's still missing the point. She doesn't want the pain required to change and deal with reality. She wants to continue her narrative.
It will require acute pain, like a one minute plank, and could take two years to implement fully. You already know what you need to do.
If you can understand Derrida, you can figure this out. This doesn't sound impossible.
Do a breakdown on Derrida, Sartre, Guattari, and Lacan please. I do not know what the different stance are between those four around the same era. Is this something to do with "bad faith"?