11 Comments

But what if not jerking off and restricting yourself from throwing the ball back to the girl are the same?

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historically this has not been the case

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Sadly, I think I remember this "short girl with reasonably big tits" of whom you speak. IIRC she quit the internet after her high school yearbook photo was leaked.

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Good post. Comes very close to Zizek's idea of "interpassivity", where you delegate your desire to an external object that "desires for you", so you don't have to. Sadly, Porn comes close to talking about this, when it describes how all pornography involves a subject, the person holding the camera or pen, that is not you. In other words, "the subject of the porn desires for me, so I don't have to [come up with the fantasy all on my own]." You have delegated your desire. Same goes for Zizek's original example: the man who tapes all his favorite shows, and then never watches them. Why? He doesn't have to. The machine watched it for him, but he can still enjoy the fantasy that he CAN watch them whenever he pleases. This is also how the news works: you delegate your desire to be "correct", or "right", or "good", or whatever.

Quitting masturbation may be effective, or not. You could also just quit porn, and just get off on your own thoughts or fantasies.

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I used to think porn was the problem, but now I'm more leaning towards porn is the most recent most powerful manifestation of something larger

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Completely agree, it's something I've been thinking/writing about too. My problem is that all the ways of framing "the problem" seem "true enough" but none seem "undeniably/obviously true".

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Already tempted to think that "hustle porn" and "insight porn" are the "pornography of pornography": We are not getting girls directly, or even watching porn to cope, but to cope with the inability to watch porn and be a degenerate contrarian. It drifts closer into NPC/wagie territory with each simulation for the next cope.

Andrew Tate merely drifts into a worse genre of the same thing. There are always more idiots to grift from. The only alternative is to do what one really wants, even if it is hard. "Self-improvement is masturbation" says a schizoposting soap maker.

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If not doing the worst deed for 11 days and more is the key to saving my friends then I'll try to not be a retarded animal who gets mislead easily by mysterious tricks. The first time it happened it wasn't even deliberate but an accident in a comedy of errors kind of way but then I liked it and that's when the conscious decision and the excuses began. Having good tangible goals tricks you into getting on the right track again yes.

My intuition tells me a lot of guys who claim to be against masturbation are still not honest or forthcoming enough about the fact that they probably still do it. Humiliation is not fun, sure. But if I have to humiliate myself by saying weird uncomfortable undesirable things about myself to friends, loved family members and internet strangers and feel intense, anxious embarrassment, then these guys have to do it too.

Even with this pseudonym I'm truncating a lot of details here out of anxiety and cowardice and then retards in real life and online have the audacity to call me "brave" or "kind" or "intelligent" when I haven't really proven myself to anyone, because apparently doing a weak and half-hearted effort these days counts as the genuine article now

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*checks to see if the feds are watching, just gonna assume they are and say f it*

I remember the grail quest, the way you've laid everything out in this essay proves to me that the internet is the collective unconscious on steroids.

The Holy Grail aka Alchemical gold aka the Immortal Infant aka Jin Dan aka Golden Elixir aka your own personal McGuffin is about self-cultivation so as to attain the unobtainable: a state of being that defies the laws of our nature, i.e. rising above immediate ego/id-gratification to become super-duper.

4Chan's Holy Grail is an almost perfect subversion of that:

IIRC that vid was dubbed the Holy Grail not because it was about a small blonde girl with big boobs (they're everywhere on the internet), but because it should not exist according to the laws of the state. Allegedly, the girl was underage and actually in high school, i.e. she was the literal tiny high school girl fetish which men are not allowed to want anymore. A video of her having sex would be the fulfillment of all the basest desires. The only way it could be worse is if it was also a snuff film. But then it wouldn't be funny and society's most autistic would not have spent years of their potential, potential they could have spent attaining samadhi, questing after it.

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Another thought:

I used to have a boss who would make unsettling comments.

Dude was a dad. Kids. Happily married. Creative Director.

But his frame of reference for evaluating work was often sex.

"This gets me hard" or "Daddy likes"

He said it in a casual way. Not like he was trying to bone anyone.

I dismissed it as him being a stud back in the day, or would like everyone to think so.

But now I think it's a little deeper than that.

I don't know how you can reference the spiritual without resorting to allegory.

It all has to be metaphorical, because "The Tao that can be named is not the true Tao".

Even New Age stuff is metaphorical.

Chakras, energy waves, consciousness illumination.

Body, water, light. That's not *literally* what's going on.

It's a descriptor of a feeling which is in turn a spiritual experience.

He just chose sex so he could still be kinda manly when discussing the merits of a story idea designed to sell 4-door sedans to yupsters.

But it is how we're supposed to feel about our work, our labors, our fruits.

Problem is, as you say, we short-circuit and life hack it so that there's no dopamine left, no release available for achievement itself.

Add to that this idea that it's lame to get excited about anything other than consumables and what have you got left but men who would rather jerk than work?

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glad you're making anti jerking off posts because everybody else either never jerked off or is too done with saying the words jerk off to say them again

btw thoughts on sadly porn?

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